When The White Lily Wilts.

"This is what you want, right? This was what you wished for."

She sat beside the bed, not knowing what to say but weep silently. His words felt like knives thrown straight into her heart. To be honest, it was what she really wanted a few weeks ago. Her heart felt so sure, she would have regretted if she didn't talk it out to him. But somehow, things began to muddle up. She didn't understand her own feelings anymore.

"So it's like this. We don't have to care about each other anymore. This is what you want, isn't it? You go on with your life and settle down things first. One day, when you're okay, text me. If you don't feel like it, then don't. I don't mind anymore."

She felt even tortured. The fact that he wanted to hang her in this kind of relationship pained her. Why not just let go? And for the love of the world, why can't she say anything?!

A few weeks ago, she was very sure she was going to be okay with her decision. She promised herself she would never shed a single tear because of a guy anymore. She was very sure because it was what she wanted. But now, not only she broke her own promise, she even felt unsure of herself. She couldn't help but let the tears flow as she uttered out those words of surrender. 

"Okay. It's a deal." She managed to say before their phones disconnected. He just ran out of prepaid. And she has a few cents left. She felt like ramming herself to a wall, kicking herself and screaming out loud. She hated those tears. She didn't understand why she had to feel sad for something that was of her own decision. 

But it has been 4 years. To be exact, 4 years and a few months. In a few months more it would turn 5. It wasn't something developed in a short duration. It was something planted from a little seedling, weeded and cared for with lots of love. Maybe that was the reason for those tears.

"Go and enjoy all the space you need. When you've had enough, you can come back to me. I don't mind if that time is going to be after two years. Just text me when the time comes. If it doesn't, than leave it be. I'm sorry for everything. I love you."

She read the text she just received with grief. The last text she would ever receive from him after that moment. 

As she sat on her bed, trying to stop the never ending tears, another text message came. At first, she didn't feel like reading it at all. She had half thought it was another text from him. In that condition, reading another emotional text wouldn't help subdue the tears. But she saw through the corner of her eyes that the sender wasn't him. It was someone else. 

"Lily ! Are you asleep?"

During that moment, little did she know that the sender of that text was going to be the sunshine who helped her overcome her tears.

I'll never shed a single tear anymore. I promise...

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