When on board a train, there're usually two things in my head. The first would be to reach my destination safely and on time. The second would be that nobody farts around me in the coach. Yesterday, while on the way to KL Sentral to meet up with my friends for our assignment task, I forgot to bring along my earphones (my phone battery was almost drained anyway). So I had ample time to think of a lot of other things other than people farting and whether I'd reach my destination on time. I brought along The Diary of Anne Frank, but since I have mobile-sickness I just held onto the book in the coach while looking aimlessly out the window.
I don't usually notice a lot of things outside the train. If I look out the window too much I might feel dizzy. During my journeys to KL Sentral on that same route every other day, the only things I'd be noticing would be the name of stations, some graffiti on a wall, some shapes on the wall of an apartment that resembles a face, and trees. Yesterday, I tried counting how many apartments I saw along the way, but I failed because there were just too many. I had to refrain myself from counting the other buildings I saw in the distance because I wasn't sure if they were apartments. And then there was a man in red t-shirt and white shorts jogging around a lake in Subang. A man in white t-shirt on a step-ladder, probably repairing/renovating something inside an outward-facing display window of a shop building. And then an Indian woman a few seats from my right changed to a seat across the aisle. And then another Indian woman's phone fell to the floor with an unpleasant thud. I didn't look her way so that she wouldn't feel embarrassed.
I wasn't amused by all this, because sooner than I could think I was already feeling sleepy. It was 9 in the morning, and every other days during this mid semester break this is the hour I'd be struggling to open my eyes on my bed.
I remembered reading somewhere the previous night "When you pray to God, you should pray with undivided belief and faith that God will grant your wishes." Because I was bored and very sleepy, I tried wishing that I could read everybody's mind for one minute. I guess I didn't believe enough.
BONKS. That was the graffiti written on the wall. I can clearly remember it now. There were some other things but BONKS was the biggest graffiti over there. Every time I see it I always wonder who the hell drew that beautiful thing up there.
The train stopped at KL Sentral 9.30. I was glad because we promised to meet up at 10, and I still have plenty of time for myself. I was not so hungry, but I had to freshen my mind from the morning drowsiness. I had hotcakes and cold Milo at McDonald's while reading Anne Frank. I don't really like reading in public because of all the noise. My head frequently jumped to things other than the book.
Here I am sitting all alone, thinking of unimportant stuff, looking like some loser in a pink baju kurung, trying hard to focus on her book. Do people even care about my existence? I guess even if I do stupid things, nobody will care because they don't know me. If I wasn't a girl, I would've done a lot of things alone. Going out at night wouldn't be such a problem if I was not a girl. Ah, but I'm supposed to be reading this book, damn it.
That's basically what was going on in my head that time.
Omg, look at me, I'm such a loser. Wait are those people talking about me? Shut up brain just read the damn book.
And then my friend texted me saying she has arrived and was waiting in a black Myvi. I quickly finished my cold Milo and left the place, slightly feeling unaccomplished for the inability to focus reading in public.
Sometimes I wonder, what are the things other people have in their head? Do they think like me? Or are their thoughts even more organized unlike mine? It would be interesting to be able to know.
